Sunday, August 29, 2004



If I don't drive around the park,
I'm pretty sure to make my mark.
If I'm in bed each night by ten,
I may get back my looks again,
If I abstain from fun and such,
I'll probably amount to much,
But I shall stay the way I am,
Because I do not give a damn.
Dorothy Parker

Not perhaps an entirely appropriate poem given that I have spent the day on washing, cleaning, etc. - not quite the alternative activities Dorothy had in mind, I suspect. However, I feel in an utterly unreasonable mood. I am getting mired down in depression and the whole point of depression is not that you sit around and think "being objective, I'm very lucky".

In fact I seem to have got quite a bit done today. Quite why I keep on stopping, staring into space and parading my many character flaws in front of myself is beyond my comprehension: it's not as if anything new has happened. At one point I consider phoning my parents to make up with them, but then I recall that I used to feel this way every weekend ... usually straight after phoning them. It's not that I condone parricide, but at times it's bloody understandable.

So tomorrow these feelings will be gone and I'll be a little happy clappy chap again.


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