Monday, January 03, 2005

It's like working girl, but without the shoulder pads

I have stayed-up all night to write a presentation / strategy document that I will have to present tomorrow. The only other time I have seen this happen is in eighties films about big business when they've got one night to get the job done and they cluster around the board room table eating pizza, ties undone, suit jackets off, desperate to get that killer angle, when an office prole (generally bald) speaks up with "what about steel?" and everyone says "god Norman, steel? we're trying to save the firm, not bury it", but then our plucky, warm-hearted, underappreciated heroine enters and happens to mention, "what about lime green?" ("lime green?" says someone in the background, tasting the idea) and then office chief gets a look of revelation, smiles thoughtfully, and says "I think it might work".

Oh dear, I seem to have turned into a character from an eighties film. I had to imagine all the other people ("hey laph, how about re-dynamicising the business-technology relationship?", "God Norman, I'm trying to deliver a long-term framework to engineer a quality technology service relationship here, not manage user expectation to a baseline plus negative level"). Unfortunately it seemed to be the plucky warm-hearted underappreciated heroine's night off so rather than a "I think it might work" moment I had more of a "oh fuck it, it's going to have to do" hour.

With such a rubbish team of imaginery friends / imaginery business consultants it's unsurprising I'm so indecisive and can't write a strategy to save my less than sane life.

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